Disneyland Paris

Holidays

All worn out

Being cheeky!
In my sand built rocket ship
Climbing up the sunshade
Pig rustling!!!

Pirate Liam

Me and my dad being pirates at the Pirate show in Mallorca

Nearly a year

It's been a little while since I visited here but I'm doing well except for my cold, my daddy got a new job around this time last year and is still doing it. He's also lost some weight and so has my mummy. I got to nursery three times a week now and have just come back from my holidays in Alcudia, Mallorca (Balaeric Islands, Mediterranean Sea).

I created a Slide Show! Check it out!

Unemployment

My dad worked for over 24 years after leaving school and was never without a job until November 2005. He started a new job in December 2005 but gave it up because he didn't like the people he worked for.

He hasn't found a new job yet ...

It's been a while

I seem to have a flurry of posts and then nothing for ages and I apologise to anyone who became a regular reader during my early months.

So what's been going on ...

Mummy made a full recovery from her illness at Christmas and despite a small relapse in late April she appears fit and healthy. Daddy started his new job in December and then had a few problems with the people who worked for him in February. Things didn't work out as Daddy intended so he left his job and is now looking for a new one.

I had a lovely birthday (thank you) but I had a really bad cold. I was also cutting some new teeth so I didn't enjoy myself that much. My big sister, Naomi has been on a trip to Alton Towers, had a birthday and also had her first boyfriend. Naomi bought a webcam and was showing pictures to her friends but Daddy took it off her as he had said she wasn't to get one until our Internet speed was up to 8Mb.

It's Mummy's birthday tomorrow so I have to think of a present for her and to buy a card otherwise she might get upset. Daddy will take me shopping later today. Daddy's car exhaust snapped but didn't fall off. Mummy's also snapped and she got a new one. Daddy is saving his money up for a new one.

Speaking of new things, Mummy and Daddy's new bed finally arrived after 4 months of waiting. Daddy built it yesterday and it's very comfortable. Mummy said she slept very well. Daddy also had to get some new parts for his computer as the Motherboard broke down. He needed a new processor and memory as well. He also bought some memory for Naomi's computer. Daddy set up a wireless network in our house so Naomi can go on the Internet in her bedroom without disturbing Daddy from his job hunting.

I have to go to bed now so Daddy might add a few comments of his own ...

MUMMY!!!

My mum was very ill this morning. She was dizzy and seemed disorientated. Dad took her to Bedford Hospital (we were still at my nana's house) because she collapsed and started vomitting. I was scared and so was dad.

When mum got to the hospital she had to be given some antibiotics and the doctor said she had to stay in. Mum said she wanted to come home to look after me. A second doctor said she had to stay in hospital because she was so ill. Her CRP count was 277 against a normal count of 5 and her White Cell Count was at 18%. The doctor said she was very lucky as she could have died if things had gotten much worse.

Mum had to take penicillin and another antibiotic for a week. She was taking the tablets 4 times a day. They said that mum had a bacterial infection in her milk bar. Mum wasn't allowed to feed me herself for a couple of days and had to use a breast pump. When she started pumping, the milk wasn't milk anymore, but was pus. It was green and smelly.

When she saw Dr Lynch, our local doctor, he said she had been looked after very well by the doctor in Bedford. He also said she was lucky the infection didn't turn into an abscess.

New Year's Eve

My mum wasn't feeling very well yesterday morning. I was ill with my cold and didn't want to eat so mum's milk bars filled up a lot.

She felt better in the evening and she stayed up very late watching televison with my dad. They seemed very happy today. Not long to my first birthday now ...

Christmas Day

I had a lovely day but I was very tired at the end.

I got lots of new toys and clothes. The toys all seem to make lots of noise and have lots of lights. When I press things on the toys, the lights come on and the noises start. The clothes all smell new and some of them are a bit scratchy.

On the day after Christmas I wasn't feeling very well. I got a cold and a cough. My mum got a cold as well. So did dad and he had to go back to work a few days later.

Strange thing in the corner

A large green spiky thing has appeared in the corner of the room.

Mum spent ages putting sparkly things and some lights on it. It looked very interesting. I decided to investigate and gave it a little pull. That was a big mistake because it fell on top of me. The spiky things stuck in my skin but I wasn't frightened. It smelt funny too, but wasn't scary.

Mum asked my big sister Naomi to tidy it up but she had a tantrum and walked out of the house while shouting at my dad. She came back later and apologised before making the big green thing look pretty again.

Mum says it's called a Christmas tree ...

Christmas

There's a strange thing in the corner of our lounge! I'll tell you more later ...

Daddy's New Job

Daddy started a new job today.

He was a bit nervous but seemed to be happy to get back to work. I don't think he was bored at home, just bit guilty because he'd never NOT had a job.

He's got one now, I hope he likes it!

Lanzarote

... is a small island off the coast of Africa but is governed by Spain. It's throw back to Spain's colonial past but has a character all of it's own.

Anyway I went there on November 24 and went on a plane for the first time outside of my mum's tummy. I quite enjoyed myself and we had lots of nice sunshine and I really liked playing in the sand.

Back again

I am really sorry for not making regular appearances however just when I promise myself that I will get back in touch, life gets complicated. So here we go with the events of the last two months.

In mid November I went on a very long trip in my mum's car to a town called Liverpool. There I saw a man who wanted a form filling in and two photographs of me. After a week, mum and dad said I had a passport. This meant I could go on holiday ...

Return of the Rogue

I'm so sorry that I haven't visited for a while but things have been so busy since Live 8 that I just haven't had the time.

Here's some of the things that have happened:

August - Dad had another birthday! We went on holiday to my grandad's lodge in the Lake District. It was very relaxing and I got to visit Blackpool for the first time. Dad also got a letter telling him that he was going to be made redundant.

September - I got some more teeth. Four all came at one time!

October - my dad had an interview for a job. He had to go back a second time but dad's car broke down on the way there. Me and mum had to rescue him.

November - the man who interviewed dad must have liked him because he offered him a job. Dad had to go away for a week to Dartford. I missed dad. When he came home dad said he was going to have a long holiday from work.

And that sort of brings you up to date but I have some exciting news coming ...

Live 8

As you can see from the post entitled Sulking my dad was very upset when he didn't win a ticket to the Live 8 concert at Hyde Park in London on July 2.

As a last gasp measure dad decided to enter a competition run by BBC Radio Leeds and the prize was one of five pairs of tickets for the Live 8 concert dad was desperate to see. Dad also put an entry in for mum.

Imagine their surprise when at 7.30 a.m. on Friday July 1 a woman came banging on our front door. Dad was still ironing his shirt for work and the woman shrieked that there was a naked man in the house. When dad opened the door she burst into the house asking for mum. Dad said she was in the bath (she was in the bath with me!).

The woman who introduced herself as Georgey Spanswick went upstairs but my dog Dawn barked at her, protecting me and mum. Eventually mum got us out of the bath and we met Georgey who was broadcasting live on BBC Local radio. She was very nice to us and explained that mum's entry had won two tickets to Live 8 in London the next day.

Dad was very pleased. Once they had stopped broadcasting mum asked if I could go as well, as mum was still breastfeeding (remember she missed the U2 concert at Twickenham when dad had to sell her ticket on E-Bay). Georgey said she would check. When she rang back later the BBC said that Live 8 recommended that children under 10 did not attend because of the noise and the long day.

Mum was very disappointed. Dad spoke to John Ryan, Editor of BBC News in Leeds. Mr Ryan agreed to take me and dad and mum to London but made no promises that we would get into the concert.

Well the good news is that after a very long time queuing we did get in. We missed the start and had to leave before the end because our bus was coming home but we had a fantastic day and I enjoyed all of the music. I'll tell you more about that later. Anyway dad and mum were very happy that day!

Teething part two

I have my first tooth.

It properly arrived last Saturday July 2. It was a very special day and if you have read the Live 8 post you will know why.

Mum is complaining now that am biting her when visiting her milk bars

Sulking

Dad is sulking because he didn't get a ticket to the Live 8 concert in Hyde Park, London on July 2.

After mum not being able to go to see U2 this weekend, dad was hoping to make it up to her by taking her to see U2, Coldplay and The KIllers. Now he can't do that. He has one last chance though because there are tickets being made available for a concert at Murrayfield, Edinburgh designed to coincide with the meeting of the G8 nations in the same city on July 6. Dad has spent a fortune on texts trying to make sure he gets tickets for this one.

He managed to sell mum's ticket on Ebay to a nice German man called Klaus. Dad is meeting Klaus on Sunday to give him the ticket and get the money for it from him. Dad is also going to stay the night at my aunt Rachael's house (where my cousin Hannah lives) in London. Rachael, Hannah and Julian (Hannah's dad) will be in Naples, Italy so dad can have a lie in on Monday before getting me and mum from my nana's house in Bedford where we will be staying.

Dad has also made a bid on Ebay for two tickets to the Leeds Carling Festival in August ( just in case he doesn't get those Live 8 tickets for Edinburgh!)

Birthday (another one that's not mine)

My big sister Samantha was 21 on Wednesday which makes dad feel old but her feel older. Dad is now less than twice her age.

We all went to Chinese restaurant in Leeds for a meal. I was asleep until dessert arrived so I didn't see much. Mum had to feed me in the toilets. When we came back out, dad was playing with me and then I was sick all down the front of his new shirt. He laughed a lot and so did the waitresses and everyone having their meals.

My granny was also there and she was talking to my aunt Helen about the brother of one of her ex-boyfriends. According to granny my sister's ex-boyfriend's younger brother is in a band and they are doing very well.

Granny said the band was called Kaiser's Chief which made my dad laugh a lot because they are The Kaiser Chiefs. My sister remembers this person and his name is Peanut.

Dad has put mum's U2 ticket up for sale on Ebay because I still won't take milk from a bottle. Dad has also tried to get some Live8 tickets for July 2 at Hyde Park, London. Mum also said that dad could bid for some Carling Festival tickets on Ebay. That made dad very happy because him and mum have been every year since they met.

That's the end of today's news from the world of music! Oh I'm going to a barbecue this afternoon so I hope it is sunny

Work

Dad went to a meeting at work about three weeks ago.

During the meeting dad's boss's boss's boss said that his company didn't need him any more because he'd done such a good job. He said that dad's work to transfer all his work on to a new computer had worked very well and should be all finished by the middle of August. After that his boss had no more work for him so dad might be staying at home during the day.

Dad doesn't seem too worried as he has already written a cv and has had some interest from new bosses. He has to stay in his current job for a while longer to get some extra money but then after his holidays he can go get a new job.

Mum is worried though but not too worried because she knows dad is clever, even if he is fat and bald. He can easily get a new job.

I'm still not eating from a bottle so mum might not be going to see U2 next Sunday. Dad seems more upset by that than from losing his job. Oh and mum and dad might be going to Live 8 to convince Mr Blair and Mr Bush to let the poor people off their debts. I think they're too hard hearted to do it so the poor people will stay poor.

Big Brother

Yes I know another series has appeared on UK TV tonight but I don't want to talk about that just yet ...

My big brother Kieron arrived at my house tonight and announced that he wanted to have his ear pierced ... in the summer ... because they would make him take it out at school. My dad had his done during his 'O' levels (GCSE's) on June 24 1979 (he told me that because I wasn't around then). Dad wasn't that surprised and I think that Kieron was a little disappointed.

I hate to tell him that there's very few things that will shock dad as he's done most of them and if I let him, he might tell you about them some time ...

Anyway Kieron also found some photos of my dad at his house when my dad was at school in the school athletics and rugby teams. He said my dad looked little. I can't believe my dad was ever little.

My granny (my dad's mum) came to visit us tonight. She told Kieron that my dad grew 8" (20cm) in one year. It made him look very tall and thin. Dad said that he was once the tallest person in his year at school.

My dad says he was never thin (I can see that from the way I can bounce on his belly)

Bottles

I like my milk bars as they provide me with food on demand.

My dad thinks that this is pretty good too as he doesn't have to waken up every time I want feeding in the middle of the night. There is however a downside as far as dad is concerned.

This weekend a lot of dads friends around the world are enjoying the release of Star Wars : Episode III Revenge of Sith. Dad loves mum very much and doesn't want to leave her at home while he goes to see the movie at the cinema.

In a few weeks dad has been invited to a local football league's presentation night. This usually means that the referee is going to be presented with an award. Dad wants to take mum anyway as he wants to show her some of the players that he tells her funny little stories about after his game. Dad will go to this one on his own anyway.

Finally, dad is a big fan of the band U2 as you can see from his "What I'm listening to" list. Dad managed to get some tickets for the forthcoming Vertigo tour. The concert is in three weeks and unless I can be persuaded to drink from a bottle, mum can't go with him. Dad has seen U2 on every tour for the last 22 years so I think we can be certain that he will be going to this one on his own if I don't make the switch.

Kittens

When Boris my cat had some kittens a few weeks ago I didn't know they were going to be this much fun.

They run around our conservatory chasing shadows, their tails and each other. Mum says they can't stay and we have to give some away. Two are going to my big sister Katharine's teacher's friend and another one is going to my aunt Margaret.

I want to keep one for myself but even with mum changing their litter tray twice a day, the house smells funny ... like catshit my dad says. Dad says when we kept Tom he thought that was enough and silly Boris keeps going out and getting more kittens so it's time for her to go to the vets for an operation.

I might tell you about dad's operations later. He didn't just have one, he had two. He's a bit grumpy because of the pain but we keep laughing and playing together. Mum says I'm not to trample him, like I would do that ...

Visits

I am currently asleep at my nana's house having travelled down there this afternoon.

I like my nana's house because it is bigger than ours but she looks like she'll need a few weeks of rest because I have tired her out ... *snore* ... Dad says we have to move house within a year but I don't know where we're going.

It all depends on where dad ends up working if he gets made redundant from his current job.

Birthday

No not mine you sillies, I'll be three months old next Tuesday! It was mum's birthday on Tuesday, she was 31.

She made a special curry for her and dad and big sister Naomi. She wasn't expecting a present from dad but he bought her a big Eeyore. I like him too because he's all fluffy. Mum also had two glasses of champagne while dad had some vodka and orange juice.

Dad also bought a great big chocolate cake. He found out that curry, chocolate cake, vodka and orange juice don't mix very well. He got "heartburn", which, according to mum is stomach acid creeping up his throat which made his voice sound very funny. He also had a cold which he gave to me but I'm feeling much better now, thank you for asking.

Dad couldn't get to sleep because of his "heartburn" and went to sit downstairs, drinking milk and watching MTV. Mum laughed at him but she wasn't feeling well either because she had too much chocolate cake.

Teething

Dad's not going to be the only one in pain this weekend as I have some very big gums in my mouth.

Mum says I'm too young to have any teeth yet but my dad told her that my big brother Kieron cut his first teeth when he was only 3 1/2 months. I'm nearly 3 months old so it won't be long. Already I'm chewing on mum's finger when it gets near my mouth.

I think I'll like having teeth, especially if they're as white as my dad's teeth. He's had lots of work done on his teeth because he broke the front ones when he was 9 years old, so they're real but not all real!

Last in the line

My dad is going to hospital this weekend for an operation.

Mum said the operation had a long funny name that she couldn't spell (even with Spellcheck!) and I can't remember the name she used. The operation means that he won't be able to make any more babies with mum. That seems alright by me because I don't want to have to share my toys with any screaming babies when I'm growing up. It also means that I'll always have the protection of my big brothers and sisters.

Mum says that dad might be walking funny for a few days and that I've not to bounce on him too much (well he's in control of that really) or he'll squeak.

Transport

I have a very nice pushchair and it takes my car seat just as well.

I enjoy sitting in my car seat and watching the world go by but I do like some privacy. So imagine my surprise when mum made some quick adjustments to my pushcahir and I could lie down but still have a view of the world.

I like travelling in my dad's car too but he drives a bit too fast. My chair in the car is at a bit of a difficult angle and I can't see what's happening outside. Mum says it's for safety reasons but it just makes me go to sleep.

Needles

Sorry I've not been around but my dad caught me on the internet and decided that I should not be allowed on the keyboard for a while.

I went back to the clinic agian this week and this time they stuck a great big needle in me - not once, but twice!

Mum took me for vaccinations and they mean that I won't catch any nasty germs which could make me ill. I'll probably thank her for it in years to come but just now my legs hurt.

Music

I know I mentioned that mum was a bit of a rock chick (look down cos I haven't figured out HTML yet enough to put in a link) but I didn't talk about music properly.

No one who has visited here over the last few weeks can have failed to notice that dad has been listening to the same music for ages.

This is not bcause he is boring, it's just that dad knows his own mind and doesn't want to bore you with his White Stripes back catalogue (4 albums!!!). By the way, if you have a copy of Coldplay's latest album, dad would like a copy (or download).

I like Coldplay too, it's calming ...

Pumping

I think mum's stamina must be flagging.

Ever since the early days (have a look at dad's old posts on here) the milk has been flowing and I have been growing. It seems that mum has been feeling the strain recently and dad has been voicing his desire to take mum out on her own for the night.

I have no objections to this in principle however I'm sure he must realise that I would like to see the new Star Wars film (Episode III:Revenge of the Sith) as well.

Anyway, apparently before I was born mum and dad went shopping at Mothercare and bought a breast pump and a few (9!!!) bottles. Mum decided to pump some milk tonight. She was a bit shy at first and managed to pump 2 ozs into a little bottle. When she came back downstairs she decided on dad's advice (good old dad - I'm very hungry these days) that she should pump out some more.

What dad didn't realise that he will have to do the feeding at 3 a.m. I think at that point dad thought that the second large vodka and orange, while watching the rugby on TV, was maybe a bad idea.

Poor dad!

Singing

Some people say that this is a skill which comes naturally and others say that it can be trained.

Looking at Charlotte Church, I feel a balance of both is probably the thing that produces the most melodic output. My dad has done a few songs in his time and if you can be bothered poking about in the older posts on his my blog you'll see what he got up to.

My mum on the other hand has been a "rock chick" in her time hanging out with bands such as WASP. In fact she must have been extra nice to one of WASP as she still has a letter from him stored in the big box upstairs. Dad thinks this is absolutely brilliant and shows why he loves mum so much, she's a bit wild you see (say it with a Charlotte Church accent and it sounds better!).

Anyay mum decided to sing Incy Wincy Spider to me today and just like happened with my big sister, Naomi, the audience (today that was me) burst into tears. Well not into tears, as that woudldn't be manly, but I just put a big lip on and looked upset, just so she got the message.

I hope she doesn't sing that to me again. I prefer her vocals to Guns'n'Roses or Aerosmith.

Clinic

The clinic is a place where I have to go every two weeks so that the nice doctors and nurses can check that my arms and legs (and other body parts) are growing correctly and from time to time, the doctors can stick needles in me.

I went to the clinic this week and met a new friend. I don't know what her name was but she was 18 weeks old (I was nine weeks old yesterday). We had a long chat about lots of things and we had a few giggles too. I was surprised that she was so old because I was the same size as her. Her hands were tiny compared to mine but her head was bigger than mine.

The nurse weighed me and I now weigh nearly 14 pounds. I was supposed to have some vaccinations this week but the doctor arranged it for his other surgery which is 6 miles away and mum didn't want to drive in a hurry across town to make the appointment.

The nurse thinks I'm very nice and the doctor thinks I'm very bright so there we have it, proof that you can have brains and beauty

Relatives II

Today I went shopping for my sister N's Birthday present. My dad bought her a nice Playboy watch. Her last one was stolen at school, which isn't very nice. She is 13 tomorrow which sounds old, but she's still "a little girl" according to mum and dad.

My big brother Kieron went to the rugby cup final at Twickenham. The team he was supporting, Leeds Tykes, beat the favourites, Bath. He went with his grandad (his mum's dad). I hope he had a good time.

I watched my Tigger singing and dancing a lot today but I can't quite grab hold of him yet. I'm sure it will get easier if I practice. I couldn't practice much yesterday as I had a fingernail which was growing into my finger.

My finger end went red and then all green. Once the gooey green stuff was squeezed out by dad, everything got better.

Clever Daddy

Daddy got promoted as a referee. He's now a County Referee.

Everyeone still shouts at him when he blows his whistle or waves his flag though

Football

My dad loves football and my mum loves rugby.

My dad says when I grow up I should be a football referee and a rugby player in my spare time. I don't think I'll have any spare time if I am a referee, because my dad has done 60 games so far this season and still has another 10 to go.

It's making his belly go away. Mum likes that ...

Shopping

I've been to a shopping centre today.

It's not the first time I've been there but it is the first time I've been awake. It was very bright and colourful but now I can't get to sleep thinking about all the nice things I saw in the shops.

Mum bought me some nice shorts!

Getting Careless

Found dad's mobile and that I can post straight here using it. Hope to use this to my advantage!

Busted

Busted
Originally uploaded by Travelling Rogue.

I have been busted.

Despite successfully avoiding being captured on camera doing the smiley thing, my dad finally caught me out!

Relatives

I seem to have a lot of people who say they are related to me.

I went to a party last night with a few of them. It was my cousin, Damien's 21st birthday. I didn't know I have anyone related to me who was that old, then dad pointed out to me that my big sister, S was nearly 21 and my grandad is nearly 70.

Next to S was my granny who is nearly 62. Come to think of it, that's over 3 times as old as my sister and nearly 3 times as old as my cousin. Anyway back to the party ... it was great.

I got milk but mum has some really spicy food which I got indirectly later. I was a bit distressed about the noise in the restaurant (The Cactus Lounge next to the BBC studios in Leeds) so dad took me outside.

A man stopped to talk to us. He was a nice man who told us about not having anywhere to live. He said that he used to sleep in a tent just across the road from the main Bus Station but the Police had begun cracking down on street people. This man and his friend were the only remaining street performers who lived on the street still living in Leeds City Centre.

They played harmonica for change and lived off that. Now the Police were cracking down, they had to observe a 9-9 curfew in the City Centre. As it was nearly 9.30 dad asked the man why he hadn't moved on. The man explained that they made 70% of their money between 9 and 2 a.m. so they were willing to take a risk. The man was at pains to ensure dad understood that he wasn't begging, just wanting paying for a performance. Unfortunately he had broken his harmonica after a disagreement with his friend.

Dad went back inside the restaurant when the man decided to move on. On the way home, dad drove around the area surrounding the restaurant until he found the man and then gave him his change. It was only a couple of pounds but the man was grateful as he now had money for a Sunday breakfast. My dad has some strange friends

Rashes

I have a rash, well to be totally honest, I have two.

One is little spots all over my face and neck. My dad and mum say it is a heat rash or a milk rash, it depends which one of them is talking to me. Both are talking to me a lot these days. It seemed to start about the same time I started smiling. I've been doing that for two weeks now and it seems to get everyone very excited.

Dad still hasn't caught me on camera yet. He's a bit old and far too slow off the mark to catch me.

The other rash I have, has appeared inside my nappy. My skin, according to mum because I can't see there (not without the aid of a mirror), has gone a bit red. It certainly stings when I have a little wee. It also stings when I wriggle my bum.

Anyway mum is using a nice thing called Sudocream. It is a bit cold when it is first rubbed on, but when it warms up it smells better than when I fill my nappy on my own.

I don't think it will hurt for very long once my cream does it's job.

Clothes

Clotheshorse 

I am sure that my mum does not know how to use the washing machine.

When I was born, all my clothes were nice and loose. I had room to pull my toes up into the body of my babygrows to keep them warm. Recently I've noticed that my toes are pushing down to the end of my legspace in my babygrows and my sleeves don't go down to my wrists.

My dad has the same problem as all his clothes seem to be much tighter than last summer. Mum says it's because "his eyes are bigger than his belly". He looks less round to me than when I first appeared and is certainly less comfortable to sleep on.

Anyway, my mum has threatened to cut the toes out of my babygrows just so my feet poke out of the bottom. The range in my wardrobe has expanded recently as I am no longer regarded as newborn. About time too as I can operate this keyboard with ease.

My grandad supports Newcastle United and he thinks this picture is funny because my dad supports Leeds United and grandad says that he has got in first so now I must support Newcastle.

I'm not too sure what they're talking about

Sleeping

I have a relaxed attitude to sleeping and so does my dad.

He's been asleep again with me on his chest and I thought I'd grind out a few words before he wakens up. So anyway ... sleeping!

I like sleeping on my bed and I don't like sleeping in my car seat. It's very nice and fits into my pushchair but there's too many straps to get comfortable. It's either a strap under my bum or one down the side of my face, not at all like my bed.

I sleep next to my mum and dad. Well I'm on mum's side of the bed as dad sleeps against the wall. I have a nice cot which swings from side to side when someone rocks it.

My dad says that I don't sleep at the right time. I like sleeping when he's at work and want to play when he wants to go to sleep. It was even worse last night, according to dad, because he lost an hour's sleep when the clocks went forward by an hour to British Summer Time. It's his own fault, he should come to bed with me and mum at 9 o'clock.

Nappies

When I want to feel warmer I just have a little wee in my nappy.

It's fine for a while but gets cold and smelly if I do it in the middle of the night.

When I do a plop, it feels all squishy and smells bad sometimes. For a few weeks while my feeding machines were not working very well, my plop was a lovely green colour and looked like it had sesame seeds in it.

Once mum's problems went away (and I don't mean dad, my big sister, the animals or the mortgage) and the milk started to flow like, well milk, my plop went a funny yellow colour.

My Health Visitor told mum my royal greenness was because I was getting lots of fore milk and not enough hind milk. Sound very strange to me but I've noticed my milk is a bit thicker and I sleep for longer between my feeds. Not that I have to you understand, because I can fed any time I want. It's just that I feel happier when I sleep for longer.

I see that dad says he hasn't captured a photo of me smiling yet. Well don't tell him but that is a deliberate ploy on my part. I sneak most of my smiles and chuckles in when he has just gone to work and mum isn't fast enough to grab the camera. I like my dad because he sings to me and makes funny faces and noises but I'm not ready to show my gums to the world. I'd rather wait until I have teeth. I don't want to look all gummy now do I?

He nearly caught me out this morning as I'd forgotten he wasn't at work this week. As he reached for the camera I remembered that I hadn't finished my breakfast and shouted for some more. He just laughed even louder, which is pretty loud I can tell you. Not quite as loud as the dog dropping her bone on the laminate floor, that really goes straight through me.

Oh he's waking up, I'd better go

Eating

It's not been an easy week as my feeding machines seemed to have packed up last week.

My soft, long haired and nice smelling mum seemed a bit upset about this. Not as much as I was, I can tell you that for nothing. I had stomach ache and my growth spurts went all out of line. It's no fun not being able to wander down to the fridge and knock up a quick cheese sandwich.

I'd like to give it a go, then I'd be like Andy from Little Britain, sneaking around the house when no-one is looking, but I think the crumbs in the crib might give it away. I'm just not able to get out of the crib and those stairs look dangerous. The fridge is a bit high and that knife that dad uses to cut the bread looks vey heavy. As for cheese well I've heard (at the clinic) that it's solid milk!

Well what's the point of that? I've got no teeth, I have milk any time I want (and I mean any time!) and the whole point of going to the fridge was for a change of taste.

So I think I'm going back to the drawing board on that one. Maybe the hairy animal (not dad!) can let me have one of her biscuits? Oh, one of the ginger things, mum calls them cats, is getting very fat. Mum says last time that happened, more little ginger things appeared. Wonder how that happened?

Right I'm off. I'm supposed to be asleep but dad's fallen asleep with me on his chest again. I'll be back later ...

Revolution

Just give me a minute ... be with you shortly ... right let's go!

Although it's been difficult to focus on the screen with my big fat bald hairy dad bouncing me up and down on his knee, it has come to my attention that my dad has been posting lots of things about his life and not mentioning me enough (but I do like the photos), so I've moved in and hope to bring this blog back into line ...

The Laughing Cavalier

The little fellow has started to laugh and to focus on faces.

This started on Thursday just as Liam turned 4 weeks old. He began to grin, not just the wind fuelled faces of a lot of infants, but open mouthed ear to ear grins. At the same time he began to lock on to people's gaze. Unfortunately we're not fast enough on the camera to capture it on disc just yet.

Emotional Intelligence

Anyone can claim to be a good team leader or team player or a manager. Emotional Intelligence is one of the crappy things by which career gurus swear. Personally if someone who works for me

• does their best
• uses their brains
• doesn't screw up
• owns up when they do screw up
• works hard to recover from their screw ups
• doesn't drop me in the shit

then I think they're doing a good job

Think about this for a while ...

1. How well can you mimic accents? Not too bad. Welsh, Northern Irish (no surprise since I was born in Belfast), Yorkshire (well nasal Leeds - think David Batty with brains), Wolverhampton and American ... just a kind of Western Drawl

2. Have you ever accidentally worn exactly the same outfit as somebody else?
Never accidently, always on purpose ... Rocky Horror Show, big man in stockings and suspenders

3. Do you often get ahead of yourself? Huh?

4. Do you answer the telephone before it rings? Yes, when M rings me. We are almost telepathic at times

5. Can you lose and/or gain weight quickly? I can do one of these but not the other ... I'll let you figure which one

6. Do you wake up before your alarm? Always

7. Do you spend a lot of time reminiscing? No. I have a lot of skeletons and a lot of cupboards. Even tonight when loading a new photo blogging tool, I found a picture of Lisa who I was with 4 years ago. We split bcause L couldn't accept that I wouldn't stay with her just because she had become pregnant (which wasn't on the agenda at the time). I liked L, she was like M in that she knew that life was for living and not for hiding. She wasn't like M in that she didn't always have a good sense of humour

8. Which these would you most want to be: Animal trainer/Actor/Stage manager OR
Detective?
Actor, then again I've done that

9. Do you undress people using your eyes? That would be telling

10. Do you ever talk about yourself in the third person? I am Rogue

11. Do people sometimes ignore your comments? Sometimes. But not if they want to have to listen to them again. I am persistent.

12. Do you finish meals quickly? Oink ... yes always. Eating is like filling up the tank of your car ... it's a necessity and it takes up time when you could be doing something more interesting instead

13. Do you have knack for knowing when the traffic light is going to turn green?
Yes I watch for amber

14. Are you comfortable with silence? Yes, especially if I am thinking or working

15. Do people ever tell you that you look like someone else? Ross Kemp nowadays but I was Simon Le Bon or John Taylor of Duran Duran for a long time

16. Do you set your watch and/or clocks ahead? No, what's the point. I would only think that they are fast and make allowance for it

17. When you played hide-and-seek as a child, you were? Seeker

18. How much do you love animals? I have a dog, 2 cats (soon to be more ... Boris, who is a female cat has been shagging around), 2 guinea pigs and 2 birds in a cage. That's not to mention the dead shrews Boris hunts, kills and brings home or the fleas to which she is host

19. How much do they love you? Dog thinks I am Pack Leader, cats treat me with contempt, but Tom (son of Boris) is dim and forgets that he's supposed to be snooty and aloof, pigs and birds ignore me

20. Do you often wonder where the day went? Always, my days are too full

21. Do you enjoy being in the spotlight? Oh yes

22. Do you plan ahead? Rarely further than the weekend

23. Can you usually tell how people are feeling? Only from exclusive observation

24. Any major plans this week? No, just a few matches to referee and then next week off work!

25. Do you talk to your pet? Of course

26. Does your pet talk back? Dog sometimes sings to me

27. Do you accomplish tasks more quickly than others do? Yes, I am a modest genius

28. Finally, did you watch the Academy Awards? No, they're dull

The only thing to drink on a night like this

Downing a pint of the black stuff